she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize