I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
