is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
