ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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