The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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