Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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