Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Randomize
