Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
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Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
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What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize