What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
