he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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