so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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