What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
