This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
