i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize