I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Mom said you looked used
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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