Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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