You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
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I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
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