Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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