There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize