Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
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Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
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I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?