drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
