I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize