my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
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