69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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