Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize