some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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