I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
