College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
