Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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