This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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