East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
