How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
