You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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