So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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