that's an acceptable place to lick
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize