none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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