New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
