Swine flu. Run for my life!
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
only you would photoshop your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize