with your own penis?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
