Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I have already put on my inside pants.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
