They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
When are your genitals available?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
