singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
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I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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