Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
