is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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