Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
