so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
