it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
