come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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