if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
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