is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
