Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize